The Joy of CFS
2005-01-14 11:39![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
flexibeasti've recently been corresponding with a friend about health issues. We both have clinical depression1, and we've been discussing the difficulties of having depression in a society in which most people simply don't understand it.
In addition to talking about depression, i've also been talking about my experiences as someone who has Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS). CFS - which is also often referred to as Myalgic Encephelomyelitis (ME) - has dominated my life for many years now. It greatly restricts my physical activity, and causes me a great deal of pain on a daily basis - going out of the house requires a lot of effort.
Unfortunately, just like depression, CFS is misunderstood. i've found that many people's response to learning that i have CFS is "Oh yes, i'm tired all the time as well." To me, this is similar to someone saying "You're a paraplegic? Oh yes, my feet get sore as well." For me, CFS has involved having to crawl to the shower in the morning, because i don't have the strength to stand up; it has involved constant pain in my legs and lower back; it has involved having to physically lean on my former partner (who is smaller than i am) when trying to walk into work.
It's also meant constantly having to deal with people thinking that i'm just a slacker, someone who merely has an attitude problem. It's meant losing friends and acquiantances, because i'm usually unable to socialise with them on their terms - attending parties, clubs, etc. requires a lot of effort, one that i'm typically unable to sustain for long (and sometimes even short) periods. It's meant that my social activism - something i feel passionately about - is often limited to what i can do via the net (the net has actually been a boon for me - before i got permanent net access, i felt really isolated). And it's meant that i've had to cope with the psychological pressure of having to constantly justify my illness, to justify everything i do and don't do.
On the other hand, dealing with CFS and depression (not to mention Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, OCD, as well!), has also led to a number of positive outcomes: i've become tougher psychologically, less inclined to take on the judgements of others and more inclined to have faith in myself, faith that i'm doing the right thing and doing the best that i can; i've become much more in touch with the needs of my body, responding to them appropriately instead of just ignoring or overriding them; and i've come to place a lot more value on compassion than i used to2.
If you're interested in learning more about CFS/ME, there's lots of info available on the net, such as on the ME/CFS Society of Victoria website.
In addition to talking about depression, i've also been talking about my experiences as someone who has Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS). CFS - which is also often referred to as Myalgic Encephelomyelitis (ME) - has dominated my life for many years now. It greatly restricts my physical activity, and causes me a great deal of pain on a daily basis - going out of the house requires a lot of effort.
Unfortunately, just like depression, CFS is misunderstood. i've found that many people's response to learning that i have CFS is "Oh yes, i'm tired all the time as well." To me, this is similar to someone saying "You're a paraplegic? Oh yes, my feet get sore as well." For me, CFS has involved having to crawl to the shower in the morning, because i don't have the strength to stand up; it has involved constant pain in my legs and lower back; it has involved having to physically lean on my former partner (who is smaller than i am) when trying to walk into work.
It's also meant constantly having to deal with people thinking that i'm just a slacker, someone who merely has an attitude problem. It's meant losing friends and acquiantances, because i'm usually unable to socialise with them on their terms - attending parties, clubs, etc. requires a lot of effort, one that i'm typically unable to sustain for long (and sometimes even short) periods. It's meant that my social activism - something i feel passionately about - is often limited to what i can do via the net (the net has actually been a boon for me - before i got permanent net access, i felt really isolated). And it's meant that i've had to cope with the psychological pressure of having to constantly justify my illness, to justify everything i do and don't do.
On the other hand, dealing with CFS and depression (not to mention Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, OCD, as well!), has also led to a number of positive outcomes: i've become tougher psychologically, less inclined to take on the judgements of others and more inclined to have faith in myself, faith that i'm doing the right thing and doing the best that i can; i've become much more in touch with the needs of my body, responding to them appropriately instead of just ignoring or overriding them; and i've come to place a lot more value on compassion than i used to2.
If you're interested in learning more about CFS/ME, there's lots of info available on the net, such as on the ME/CFS Society of Victoria website.
1. As distinct from the sort of 'depression' that people have when they're feeling down because their favourite tv show is over for the year.
2. Whereas i previously thought that compassion was important, now i think it's a sine qua non, both in terms of people's personality and in terms of society as a whole; so that i'm now far less patient with people who i feel continually demonstrate, in a practical sense, a lack of compassion towards others.
