I even get a little annoyed when people say "I'm poly, my partner is mono" or even vice-versa. Poly and mono describe the way you organize a relationship, not your deep down personal identity. "I am best suited for poly relationships" is more accurate. But cheating on a person who thinks they're in a mono relationship is so NOT polyamory.
I agree that casual sex is not a part of polyamory, but I do think that there's a BIG overlap of people who are in polyamorous relationships and people who are in relationships that are open to casual sex with other people. Once you get to the "your having sex with someone else does not indicate that you don't love me" place of non-monogamy, then there's a lot of room for negotiation.
no subject
Date: 2006-03-02 14:59 (UTC)I even get a little annoyed when people say "I'm poly, my partner is mono" or even vice-versa. Poly and mono describe the way you organize a relationship, not your deep down personal identity. "I am best suited for poly relationships" is more accurate. But cheating on a person who thinks they're in a mono relationship is so NOT polyamory.
I agree that casual sex is not a part of polyamory, but I do think that there's a BIG overlap of people who are in polyamorous relationships and people who are in relationships that are open to casual sex with other people. Once you get to the "your having sex with someone else does not indicate that you don't love me" place of non-monogamy, then there's a lot of room for negotiation.