Proof

[flexibeast]

"So, you claim you're poly / lesbian / trans / male / bisexual / female / etc., eh? Prove it."

The notion of having to 'prove' one's identity is an interesting one. On the one hand, it seems outrageous: what would it take, for example, to 'prove' that you're bisexual? On the other hand, it seems a reasonable attempt at self-protection by marginalised groups: it can help to ensure that there's some sort of coherent "group perspective", which in turn may help to provide a strong response to any attacks on that group. It's certainly not something new; one of the most famous 'proofs of identity' was the ability to properly pronounce 'shibboleth':

And the Gileadites took the passages of Jordan before the Ephraimites: and it was so, that when those Ephraimites which were escaped said, Let me go over; that the men of Gilead said unto him, Art thou an Ephraimite? If he said, Nay; Then said they unto him, Say now Shibboleth: and he said Sibboleth: for he could not frame to pronounce it right. Then they took him, and slew him at the passages of Jordan: and there fell at that time of the Ephraimites forty and two thousand.

-- King James Bible, Judges 12:5-6

And of course, the issue is closely related to the usefulness of the notion of 'identity', with its negative and positive aspects.

A lot of the time, i seem to 'fail' to provide the required 'proof of identities'. Yet identities are a succinct way of giving people at least a rough idea of one's preferred perspectives and behaviour; people often get upset if they feel you've 'deceived' them by not immediately specifying exactly how you differ from Normal Right-Thinking People.

It seems like a no-win game to me . . . .
 

Comments

[sacred-harlot.livejournal.com]

Yeah the burden of proof is a toughie, i well remember that I had to do this within the lesbian community, not so since being bi I have to say :-).

I guess my way of dealing with it, is to have a very concrete opinion of myself, that is not dependent on what others think of me - I obviously get upset if I feel people think I am one way instead of how I know myself to be, but i will seek to check if they think that way, and question if it is just me feeling insecure about myself. I have come to the conclusion that I do my utmost to be the best person I can be in action and deed. So if others think otherwise of me, then there is not much I can do about that if they are not able to see who I am, then that is for them!

Love,
Sacred Harlot xxx.

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

i well remember that I had to do this within the lesbian community, not so since being bi I have to say :-)

Yes, the Victorian bi community is great in that regard. :-)

I obviously get upset if I feel people think I am one way instead of how I know myself to be, but i will seek to check if they think that way, and question if it is just me feeling insecure about myself.

Good point . . . . to a certain extent i feel that, having been so thoroughly 'judged' by my peers during my formative years, i may indeed be overly sensitive to any suggestion that someone may be judging me. Particularly as i continually strive to be the most ethical person i can - including acknowledging when i haven't behaved that well.

So if others think otherwise of me, then there is not much I can do about that if they are not able to see who I am, then that is for them!

True. On the other hand, i'm still not mature enough to not be frustrated by the fact that our society is just as happy with people appearing to do the right thing as they are with people actually doing the right thing . . . .

[cheshire-bitten.livejournal.com]

Clearly to prove you are bisexual, you have to have sex with whoever claims you are not, and there girlfreind right now.

/irony

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

*laugh* Silly me, how could i forget? :-)