no subject

[flexibeast]

It just occurred to me earlier today how much work i've done to support social activism projects that have (it seems) never come to fruition. i've written pieces for bi anthologies which never ended up getting published. i've been given the opportunity to write about the state of bisexual activism in Australia for an international journal, only to have my efforts snubbed by bi activists, forcing me to withdraw my proposed submission. i've written long and complex contributions for postgrad projects about queer issues - projects whose final status i've not been notified of. i've done a video intereview about polyamory for a documentary - a documentary that i've never heard anything more about.

Essentially, i've done a lot of work which hasn't at all benefitted either me or the causes i'm seeking to promote. So this is why, nowadays, i need some definite indicator from people that they are willing to give, as well as take, before i get too close to them, or offer to help them out. i've wasted far too much time and energy on selfish people, to the detriment of those close to me: people who are not selfish, who are unwilling to use others in a Machiavellian way, who are genuinely caring. And since i've prioritised the latter over the former, i've been much happier. :-)
 

Comments

[gendertrash.livejournal.com]

that really sux, and is extremly anoying and disapointing especially when you are putting so much of yourself into these sorts of projects and then nothing ever comes from them...i think it's especially anoying when they arn't yours specifically (as in it's something you are sending in a submission for) and thus you have no control over it.

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

Yes, that lack of control has been the source of much frustration . . . . at least with Pleasure Activism Australia, if nothing is happening, i'm in a position to actually try doing something about it.

[ruth-lawrence.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry to hear so much of your work has come to little.

It's surely a bad time for progressives right now, but I'm hoping change is in the air.

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry to hear so much of your work has come to little.

Thanks. *weak smile*

It's surely a bad time for progressives right now, but I'm hoping change is in the air.

Well, the issue for me personally is not so much the political climate, but people's behaviour. Basically, my experiences demonstrate to me that most people, irrespective of their supposed political orientation, won't treat other people with respect unless they absolutely have to - and even then, there's a good chance that they're mainly doing it to either (a) keep up appearances, or (b) stay in the 'In' crowd.

i agree with Gandhi when he said "Be the change you want to see in the world". And the sort of behaviour i describe above, whether coming from 'progressives' or not, is certainly not what i want to see in the world.

[ruth-lawrence.livejournal.com]

A lot of people are situational-progressives, or are not self-starters, or have grandiose plans that crash, and a lot of us continuous-progressives are exhausted.

I don't see people quite so cynically as you picture them, mind you, despite my experience with bloodybloody female BDSM dominants...

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

A lot of people are situational-progressives, or are not self-starters, or have grandiose plans that crash, and a lot of us continuous-progressives are exhausted.

Heh, i'm so exhausted that i've got CFS, but it's difficult for me to stop doing activist stuff wherever i can . . . .

In any event, i certainly understand (first-hand!) what it's like to run out of energy for a particular project; but i would suggest that out of simple courtesy/civility/respect, it would be nice to drop a line to those who have been helping you with your project and say "Hey, sorry to say this, but i can't go ahead with this at this stage." That would indicate to me that they are thinking of me as a person, rather than as an object they can discard at will . . . .

I don't see people quite so cynically as you picture them, mind you, despite my experience with bloodybloody female BDSM dominants...

Heh . . . . i prefer to think of myself as a realist, at least on this particular issue. :-) Because when my expectations weren't realistic, i was constantly let down by people; whereas now that i've drastically lowered my expectations, i'm let down far less often.

Nonetheless, i take much comfort in the fact that there are a minority of people - such as my partner, my companion, and my friends - who continually demonstrate just how amazingly wonderful humans can actually be. :-)

[ruth-lawrence.livejournal.com]

I agree with you on the thank you notes.

People really do seem to be poor at thanking others, and poorer still at validation.

[sacred-harlot.livejournal.com]

Huge loving hugs Darling, >:D< I very much appreciate you!

much Love,
Sacred Harlot X.