Hair

[flexibeast]

i've started to get really down of late about my facial hair - at least, the non-lower-lip-goatee portion of it. Being bigendered, i assumed that i would just be able to accept it as an unpleasant, but bearable, side-effect of being partly male. In recent times, though, i feel really disgusting and ugly on those days when i'm not clean-shaven: when i'm clean-shaven, i look in the mirror and think "Hey, you're not bad looking :-)"; when i'm not, i don't want to look in the mirror. The obvious solution is to simply shave every day, but unfortunately my skin simply can't handle that, and my hair doesn't grow enough in a day for me to do so anyway. So at best, i can shave my face once every four days or so, and in the meantime, i feel gross.

This probably sounds stupid, or pathetic, or both, but it's becoming an increasingly heavy psychological burden. And laser-based hair removal is way out of my price range. i don't know what to do.
 

Comments

[catsnstuff.livejournal.com]

It may be worth investing time to see if you can shave in a more gentle manner (and hence be able to do it more often). Search the net for tips concerning shaving with sensitive skin. Some I am aware of are making sure you have a sharp razor, softening the hair beforehand with a warm facecloth, and applying a balm afterwards. My beautician suggests applying Tend Skin after waxing to avoid ingrown hairs - it says it helps for after-shave care also.

It may also be worth asking an actual beautician about this. Perhaps make an appointment for a leg-wax or a facial, and ask while you are there. I'm not sure what your price-range is - they may recommend some expensive product or similar - but it may be worth a go.

From what I understand, waxing pulls at the skin - if you try waxing your face too much, it might age more rapidly, and frankly, it sounds far too tricky (I gave up attempting to do my waxing a while ago, and don't miss it in the slightest). You would also have much longer periods of regrowth. You can buy bleaching products, but I've never use them and have no idea what effect they'd have on your type of facial hair, which is likely to be much thicker than the stuff it's intended for.

[cheshire-bitten.livejournal.com]

when I was shaving my head all the time I started using a chemical melting treatment which while creepy as hell seemed to work, also transfem friend of mine used an epilator on zie's face but I don't know if you could deal with that. (or if I could)

[firinel.livejournal.com]

What about waxing? I'm not sure how frequently your sensitive skin could handle that, but when I've worried about it, that was the route that I went and was well pleased with it.

[xanthrant.livejournal.com]

I dunno...I'd roll with it being a priestess of Baphomet and all...I'd look at it like a blessing from the Mystery that is Baphomet. Embrace that animal nature that is within you and become one with nature. Sure, it can be frustrating if you're attempting a certain look, but why be ordinary? Be the blessed pleasure servant of Baphomet and accept your blessing!

(maybe it sounded a skosh insensitive, but please know that Mother Eris is at my hands making these keys work their way...no doubt you're hot no matter how ya look)

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

It may be worth investing time to see if you can shave in a more gentle manner (and hence be able to do it more often). Search the net for tips concerning shaving with sensitive skin.

*nod* Good idea.

Some I am aware of are making sure you have a sharp razor

*nod* Indeed. However, i tend to blunt razors quickly, and get annoyed at the cost of continually replacing them. On the other hand, i clearly have to balance out this cost with the psychological cost of having an overly hairy mug.

softening the hair beforehand with a warm facecloth

*nod* Also a good idea; i should certainly be doing that.

It may also be worth asking an actual beautician about this.

*nod* Another good suggestion. :-)

Re. waxing: yes, i've wondered about doing this, but got the feeling - based on when i've given waxing a go elsewhere on my body - that it was probably a no-goer. And that's before considering what you've pointed out about the effects that too much waxing might have on my face.

i don't think bleaching is an option - it's just not about how the stubble looks, it's about how it feels as well.

Thanks for your thoughts! :-)

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

That's interesting - what was the name of the treatment?

Re. the epilator - heh, i'm not sure if could either; but i suppose there's only one way to find out. :-)

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

Ah, okay. Well, as i said to catsnstuff above regarding waxing,

i've wondered about doing this, but got the feeling - based on when i've given waxing a go elsewhere on my body - that it was probably a no-goer. And that's before considering what you've pointed out about the effects that too much waxing might have on my face.

But perhaps i should try waxing just a small part of my face regularly, see how that works out, and take it from there.

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

I do feel gross/ugly when I've gone too long without shaving and my skin's too sensitive to do it more regularly.

*sad nod* Well, we can commiserate together. :-)

(Additionally, trich goes along with taking insufficient care of of the facial hair, which certainly doesn't help.)

:-((

I've found that aftershave helps immensely, as does shaving in the shower

*nod* Unfortunately, the former has never really worked for me; and due to the critical water shortages we have here in Australia, shaving in the shower is not an option either. However, catsnstuff suggested using a warm facecloth before shaving, which might well have a similar effect . . . . i'm going to give it a go, anyway. :-)

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

I'd look at it like a blessing from the Mystery that is Baphomet. Embrace that animal nature that is within you and become one with nature. Sure, it can be frustrating if you're attempting a certain look, but why be ordinary? Be the blessed pleasure servant of Baphomet and accept your blessing!

*chuckle* Well, that's certainly another way of thinking about it. :-) But . . . . it's difficult to describe, but to me this is part of the journey of discovering who 'i' am. And whereas having a lower-lip goatee feels 'right', other facial hair feels 'wrong'. So then the issue becomes: do i be a wuss and just mope about it, or do i actually do something positive about it? And given not only my spiritual leanings, but also the suggestions that others have made in this thread, i feel that the latter is the way to go. :-)

(maybe it sounded a skosh insensitive, but please know that Mother Eris is at my hands making these keys work their way...no doubt you're hot no matter how ya look)

lol! That's very optimistic of you. :-)

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

Argh! i've just gone and accidentally deleted winterkoninkje's comment. :-(( So i'm reproducing the text of it here:

If it makes you feel any better, I'm the same way. I don't have quite the issues of not wanting to look in the mirror, but I do feel gross/ugly when I've gone too long without shaving and my skin's too sensitive to do it more regularly. (Additionally, trich (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trichotillomania) goes along with taking insufficient care of of the facial hair, which certainly doesn't help.)

I've found that aftershave helps immensely, as does shaving in the shower (the heat/moisture helps soften the hair which leads to less irritation). If your hair doesn't grow enough to shave daily, those might still help for doing it more often at least.

[cheshire-bitten.livejournal.com]

I don't remember but I know that it is still sold next to the razors in the big supermarkets.

[sacred-harlot.livejournal.com]

*lol! That's very optimistic of you. :-)* nice try sweetie, but I know what ya look like and I think that you are tres jolie (very gorgeous)!

Sacred Harlot X.

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

*nod* i'll look for it - thanks. :-)

[mizzpyx.livejournal.com]

What about plucking, if you have the time? It does take forever initially, but the regrowth tends to take a while and be uneven so you can just pluck whatever grows back as it grows back.
Also, it tends to hurt way less after the first couple of times. And I'd say it wouldn't damage your skin like other methods?

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

*nod* i pluck other parts of my body, which works fairly well (as well as being cheap :-) ). But when i've tried plucking facial hair, it's been like trying to uproot defiant weeds - hence the need for me to consider more aggressive options. :-)

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

Aww, aren't you a sweetie. :-)

[firinel.livejournal.com]

it might help you to know that I found that if the stylist used a damp towel that had been heated - like the way barbers use to do when they used straight edges to shave customers - on my chin/neck area while she did my eyebrows and lip that by the time she was through, it had relaxed the hair and folicules enough that even the tough stubborn hair on the neck/chin came out fairly easily.

They also have calming cream that they put on afterwards that helps with the red bumps and irritation. The less frequently I go the more angry my skin gets, so if you go the first few times may be problematic for you, but it may also get continuously easier.

good luck with whatever you choose to do!

[naked-wrat.livejournal.com]

hierodule mujer hermosa!

[winterkoninkje.livejournal.com]

You fiend! :)

[winterkoninkje.livejournal.com]

:-((

Yeah, ocd sucks. Luckily I've gotten it under control as I've gotten older, and what bits remain are intermittent quirks rather than full-blown disorder.

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

Hmm, okay, food for thought. Thanks! :-)

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

naked_wrat, mujer loca!

;-)

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

Oh, you don't know the half of it. ;-)

[naked-wrat.livejournal.com]

Yeah, we all know that but that doesn't change anything Missy!!!

[flexibeast.livejournal.com]

Oh yes, i'd forgotten you have OCD. But yeah, i'm in a similar position - i manage my own OCD better than i used to, such that, in my current situation, it has a fairly minimal impact on my daily life. Having said that, i'm also keenly aware that some of its components are still lurking, just waiting for situations which will give them a chance to regain their former influence . . . .